Thursday, October 31, 2013

Stranger than fiction.

Last night I dreamt about going into surgery. Now that it's happened I realise it's a surprise that I haven't been dreaming of it all along. It wasn't a nightmare, or particularly scary, just all the mundane things I had to do to get ready to go in. 

I was really annoyed that someone wanted to use the plastic bag I planned to pack my underwear in...


It's not really surprising that it's in my subconscious now. I've been talking about it a lot over the one year mark. And I've also been in touch with a few people who are going through it right now. Weird how it all happens at once, I didn't hear from anyone all year and then a few all within a week. 

So I read some of the old posts back to see what they had been reading, and it's so strange to try and remember what that all felt like. It's mad, that I went through that. I don't really think about it any more, and when I do it's like telling a fictional story. Not a reality that was my life. It was surreal at the time, but even now it is no less surreal.

Reading it back is fascinating! I can see what everyone was going on about now, even though I find it quite cringe worthy.

Reading it last thing before going to sleep (ha, what is sleep please?) obviously planted it in my brain. But interestingly this dream wasn't about the surgery I had, it was a new one. People were commiserating that I had to do it again. I hope this isn't the start of me worrying about it growing back.